It’s important that children, particularly young children have enough sleep. They need to establish a good sleep pattern when they are young and to do that they need you to set a proper bedtime routine.
If left to their own devices children will just fall asleep as, when and wherever, which is not very good for you or the child. You have to set a schedule so that the child knows when and where they are expected to go to bed and what happens before bed. Children love routines and will stick with a good schedule quite happily if they are taught it early enough. So you have to establish a bedtime routine before they are old enough to be able to decide for themselves when they want to go to bed.
Introducing a bedtime routine will ensure a good sleep pattern for your child. This will mean that they will be getting enough sleep and they will be much happier, brighter and healthier and it also means that you will be able to get a good nights sleep too.
The actual time you put your child to bed will be dependant on the age and needs of your child as some children need more or less sleep than others, but here are some rough guidelines.
Children under 5 should be getting around 12-15 hours of sleep per day, including naps.
Children between 5-12 should get about 10-11 hours of sleep per night.
As I say these are only rough guidelines and some children will sleep slightly more or less than this but if they are not getting anything like this much sleep than they may be sleep deprived. So you need to work out the best bedtime for your child dependant on their needs, the amount of sleep you want them to have and the time they have to get up in the morning.
For instance my 3-year-old daughter has always been an early riser and seems to need less sleep than some children. She doesn’t have any naps during the day and we put her to bed at 7pm, which after stories and settling means that she goes to sleep about 7.30pm. She will then normally sleep until 6.00-7.00am, which means that she is getting roughly 11-12 hours sleep a night, just about the minimum recommended amount. However, to show you the variations possible I know a parent whose 3-year-old goes to bed at 6pm and sleeps through to 8am and often has a daytime nap of 1-2 hours as well. The most important thing is that you set a time that suits you and the child and is easily workable into your routine.
A good bedtime routine should be a calm, relaxing time when the child can wind down from the days activities and have some quiet time.
For example a good bedtime routine could be something like the following:
5.00pm - Tea
6pm - Bath
6.30pm - Supper and quiet time
7.00pm - Bedtime
The above times are just a guideline but the important thing is the sequence of events. After tea the child can have a bath, which can be fun but also relaxing and after their bath they can put their pyjamas on which will also get them into the bedtime mode. Then they can go downstairs or into their bedroom and have some supper and quiet time.
Supper should be light but filling so as to avoid them waking up in the middle of the night because they are hungry. It should include a milky drink and some biscuits or fruit but it should not be chocolate, sweets or fizzy drink. Anything that is high in sugar may get the child hyped-up and overactive, which is the last thing you want when they are due to go to bed soon. Along with the supper children should also be encouraged to have some quiet time to calm them down before bed.
Quiet time can be watching the telly or videos, or just playing simple, non-active games like jigsaws, puzzles, tea parties, etc. It also helps if you can keep the lights low and the curtains drawn during supper-time to indicate to the child that it is night-time and nearly time for bed.
When it is time for bed you should take them to brush their teeth, wash their face and if potty trained, go to the toilet. Then you can get them into bed with the lights low, sit next to them and read them a bedtime story. You can keep some books separate that are only for bedtime so that your child feels that bedtimes are special and are more willing to go to bed. After the stories tuck them in bed, give a kiss and cuddle and say goodnight, then turn out the main light, leaving them with a night-light if they need it.
Children make associations with how they go to sleep and by setting up a good routine you are getting your child to make positive associations with going to sleep. That is why children should not go to sleep in front of the telly as they then associate the telly with sleep and will need the telly on again if they wake to get them back to sleep again. This becomes their sleep ‘trigger’ and they become dependent on it. By getting your child to go sleep in their bed, on their own, means that they will be able to settle themselves back to sleep if they wake in the night.
If your child wakes in the night and is unable to get back to sleep on their own then you should go to them and try to settle them down. When you go to them at night try not to put the main light on full as this will fully wake and disorientate the child. Use a dimmer switch on low or put the landing light on instead.
Unless the child is absolutely frantic or inconsolable then do not get them out of bed, just try to find out the problem, remedy it quickly then get them to lie back down and settle them again as quickly and quietly as possible. Avoid talking too much just make it clear that it is still sleep time, tuck them in again and leave the room as soon as you can. Try not to still be in the room when they go back to sleep, if the child goes to sleep with you next to them they may want you there again if they reawaken.
One of the worst things to do is to take the child downstairs or into your bed. If you do this you are basically saying it is all right for them to wake up at all hours of the night and they will be rewarded, as they see it, by getting to spend more time with you. This will set a bad precedent, which you may find very hard to break later when you want your own time and bed back.
An adequate amount of sleep is one of the most basic necessities that everyone needs to have. A lack of sleep causes irritability, means you have less concentration; a lack of co-ordination, grumpiness and over time can cause some health problems. So establishing a proper bedtime routine may seem like hard work but it will save you all of those problems. It will give you a happier child, you will have more patience and it will definitely be worth it.
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